Self-harm is an addiction
So i made this sign to ask a friend to prom…
I met her in a mental hospital. the minute i met her i knew we would be great friends. we were alike in so many ways… but this girl, this poor tortured soul… she will never have the life she deserves, and it just breaks my heart.
I won’t put her name on here, but let’s call her River. River and her siblings grew up without a mother. Her younger sibling was deaf, and River ended up caring for them until they were much older. River and her siblings were locked in a closet and raped daily by her father. in front of each other. They didn’t know this was an abnormal thing to do.
when River got older her mother came back into her life. river and her siblings went to go live with the mother, who turned out to be an abusive cheating bitch who was away from home enough for River’s father to come frequently to rape them again and again.
One day they finally told someone and the father was put in jail. River joined public school,had amazing grades, and for the first time, had a best friend. finally things were starting to look better for River. Until her friend killed herself…
River has an incredible past with self harm. Her tiny body is littered with scars. i don’t know how many are from her parents and how many are from herself… but self harm is an addiction… and she has it BAD.
i know that River wants to be happy, but she is scared, and honestly i can’t blame her. i had given up on life, and i haven’t had a fraction of her misfortunes. How THE HELL do you help someone like that?
When i was in the hospital, River and i became very close. she shared things with me she had never shared with anyone before. She told me she was happier than she’d ever been. We decided to go to prom together when we both got released from the ward. she even did this cute thing to ask me.
but then one afternoon she was acting kinda funny and she went to her room for a while. She got a phone call and when they went to go get her… they had found that she had hung herself by her pants on the bathroom door…
thank god my River lived. they found her a minute before she would have died. I don’t know how much you know about mental hospitals, but of course after something like this, i knew River wouldn’t get released for a while, but i still hoped.
i thought it would be good for her. to get out and have fun (real fun, not just drugs and alcohol) with someone who cared about her. She lives really far away so we had planned for her to stay at my house for the weekend…
after i got out i stayed in touch with River. One Thursday we were on the phone and she was telling me how great things were going and that she was going to get released. i was so proud. i found out later that not even 5 minutes after we had gotten off the phone had another inpatient said something snide to her and she went to her room and swallowed a battery.
I had planned to visit a couple days later and i had made her this sign. last minute my family told me it wasn’t a good idea and we got in a large fight. my parents told me they would not allow River to stay the weekend. I hate to admit it… but even i know that it probably wouldn’t have been a good idea anyway… but i was still going to visit her.
i called the ward before i was about to leave and they told me that River wasn’t there. when i tried to get more information they snapped at me and told me to call her family. This moment was one of the scariest in my life.
i called and found out about the battery and that she had just had surgery to remove it. so instead of celebrating her leaving the psych ward… i had to welcome her back into it.
as much as i would love to see River thrive in the real world, i know it is idealistic. If left alone, River WILL take her life.
which is better… her being happy… or her being alive?
SELF-HARM IS AN ADDICTION
please raise awareness! please help! The point of no return can be prevented.
PLEASE show people kindness, love, and support. NO ONE deserves this kind of misery.